How to Transition Your Toddler from Crib to Big Kid Bed
So, you’re thinking about moving your sweet toddler into a big kid bed! What an exciting step for your family.
First things first, WHEN should this transition happen. My biggest piece of advice is to wait as long as you possibly can to make this transition. There is absolutely no rush unless your little one is climbing out of their crib, then safety takes the cake.
If you do have a climber, try putting the crib mattress directly onto the floor while still keeping the crib rails up, this can be a deterrent, as well as continuing to use a sleep sack to make climbing more difficult.
Ideally, wait until at least 3 years old, closer to 4 if you can.
It’s much more difficult for those under 3 years old to understand that they need to stay in their bed all night, not having that physical crib boundary is just too much for their little selves. They would rather toodle around their room all night than stay in bed.
PICKING A DATE
If you have decided that this transition is a go in your household, first decide the date that you will make the jump.
When picking a date, be mindful that there are no other big events happening in your toddlers' life for 3 months after the transition.
This includes things like moving, getting rid of their pacifier, or welcoming a new sibling into the family.
Once you have decided it’s time, commit to the change, toddlers thrive on consistency and predictability. It can take time for them to adjust to this big change but it is our job to remain consistent and predictable for them throughout the transition.
PREPARING YOUR TODDLER
We don’t want to spring this on our toddler. Mark on the calendar the day that you will make the transition. Have your toddler help you cross off each day and remind them what will happen in x number of days.
ie. “You have grown so big and it’s time to get your own big bed, only 5 more nights in your crib!”.
Books - Take books out of the library that discuss moving from a crib to a big kid bed and relate this back to your own toddler and their situation.
Roleplay - This may seem silly but it really works so well with toddlers. Use dolls, animals, dinosaurs, whatever, and have your toddler tuck them into bed for the night.
Roleplay what will happen if your toddler gets out of bed in the middle of the night. Go pretend to sleep in your bed and have them walk in to see you. Walk them back to their room, tuck them into bed, and say goodnight.
Then reverse the roles and have them pretend to sleep in your bed while you come and get them. Have your toddler walk you back to their room and tuck you into bed.
Do this preparation for at least 3 to 7 days.
PUT YOUR TODDLER IN CHARGE
Give your toddler a job to take on during this transition. Have them choose between two different sheet sets, two different pillows, or if you feel comfortable with it, two different beds.
Toddlers love to be in control, and while these are two choices that you have previously vetted, giving them the final say is so big to them.
MAKING THE TRANSITION
The day has come! It’s time for your toddlers' first night in their big kid bed.
Go through their usual bedtime routine and tuck them into bed. Say goodnight and leave their room.
GETTING OUT OF BED
On any given night, have one parent handle all of the post-bedtime and middle-of-the-night wakeups. You can absolutely trade-off from night to night but on your night, you handle all the wakes.
If your toddler gets out of bed, walk them back to their bed.
We want this interaction to be brief, boring, and to the point. Once they are back in bed, say a goodnight phrase to them.
ie. “It’s time to sleep now, I love you!”.
Do this walk back for as many times as it takes. Toddlers are persistent little cats but sticking with this and doing the same thing over and over and over is SO KEY.
CALLING OUT
Maybe your toddler isn’t actually getting out of their bed, but calling out for you. As with the previous section, have one parent handle each one of these instances.
On night 1, wait for 1 minute, go in, say your goodnight phrase, and then back out again. If your toddler calls out again, wait 2 minutes, go in and say your phrase, and back out. Again? 3 minutes, go in, say your goodnight phrase and back out again. Stay at 3 minutes for remaining check-ins.
Night 2, wait 2 minutes, 3 minutes, stop at 4 minutes.
Night 3, wait 3 minutes, 4 minutes, stop at 5 minutes, and so on and so forth as the nights go on.
FOLLOW UP
If your toddler had an amazing night - ALL THE PRAISE. Hype them up so much, they rocked it.
If they had a challenging night - no big - they’ll get there. Continue to roleplay throughout the day and ensure that they understand how things are going to play out.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Be boring. Be consistent.
Keep check-in or walk-back interactions as quick as you can, 30 seconds or so should do the trick. Say your goodnight phrase and then you're outta there.
Toddlers can be insanely persistent but try not to negotiate or have any negative [or positive] feedback for them during post-bedtime or middle-of-the-night wakings.
Brief. Boring. Consistent.
EXTRA TIP
Consider using an ok-to-wake clock.
These can be introduced and be beneficial as early as 22 months.
Roleplaying work well in this scenario. We always want to keep our toddlers in the loop so that they understand what is happening and what is expected.
Make sure they understand what the bedtime color is [if you are using an overnight light] and what color they will see when it’s time to get out of bed in the morning.
If using an overnight color - I recommend red. It is the least disruptive to sleep.
Let them choose between two morning colors if your clock works that way.
Ie. “When you wake up in the morning do you want your clock to be purple or green?”.
Set them up for success by setting the color change slightly earlier than they usually wake and then slowly moving the time later.
REMEMBER, YOU GOT THIS.
This is a big transition for your toddler! It’s exciting, but can be a lot for your toddler. Go in with a plan, be patient, be consistent and you will settle into your new routine in no time.
Hey there!
I’m Elyse - Mumma to sweet Ella [& Maren the pup!]. Ella loves her sleep - in the crib, on the go, and when we travel.
But - there was a time not too long ago when I did not feel on top of the sleep game…at all. The struggle was real and had me big time doubting my mom-ing.
I want to help you say buh-bye to that feeling of defeat, empower you with all the sleep knowledge, and get you and your babe the peaceful night sleep you deserve.
